Weeping

I had a hard time coming up with the right name for this blog. I thought of some lame stuff and you know of course a lot of stuff is already taken, so it makes it more challenging. I decided on this - it's excerpts of lyrics from Flightless Bird, American Mouth. I first heard this song a long time ago as part of the Twilight soundtrack, but recently heard it again as part of a newer Twilight soundtrack. It's the "wedding version" of the song...it's slower and almost heartbreaking somehow. There are all kinds of interpretations of what the lyrics really mean online - I guess it's up to the listener to decide.

I'm so sad right now. I'm trying to be brave or whatever - calm or detached or I don't even know what.  I just feel like there is never a way you could choose this life and I'm waiting for the inevitable. I guess I don't even know that's what I want right now, but I can't help but feel this as the first step toward being alone.  I go back and forth almost daily. It doesn't matter to me to be without you.  I can't imagine being without you. I'm so mad and hurt and destroyed. All that matters is you. I don't know how to manage those feelings. I thought we would be together forever. It's not that I can't build a new life. It just hurts so much to think about getting to the other side. I know I'm supposed to be thinking about myself  and figuring out what I want, but I almost just can't think about getting over you.